What I'm Thankful For: Reflecting on 2020
Whew, this year has been a whirlwind and we still have over a month left. The problems the world has faced this year have been astronomical and will continue on after the ball drops (if they are even doing that this year). 2020 has been a year of great divide, isolation, and hurt for most of the world and I wish nothing more than to wind the clocks back and make it all disappear. Everyone is hurting, regardless the severity of the impact COVID/BLM/the election had on them personally. I've taken major steps back in my career, have no idea when my field will even be functioning again, gotten into political fueled fights with friends and family, felt alone, felt suffocated in my family home, gave up numerous times, and suffered from an intense case of situational depression. I'll be 100% honest, I have not felt like myself since March and have had a really hard time seeing a life past this. I am also aware that I am in a far better position than others and do not want to take away from the hurt they are feeling.
But for my own mental health (and maybe a few of yours!), I wanted to sit down and reflect on some of the things I am grateful for that have come out of this year.
I got to spend more time with family: I was one of the lucky New Yorkers who got to leave before things got really bad and spend time with my family in Maryland. After I graduated from college, I thought I would never be back for more than a few days ever again. Though I slowly went a little crazy being in such close corders with them for 6 months, I am grateful to not only spend some time with them, but get a little break on spending grocery money.
I had more time to do things I enjoy: I have not denied myself little joys all year. Want to make some fancy avocado toast? Do it. Want to spend all day reading the book you always told yourself you'd read? Seize the day. Don't want to cake foundation on your face ever again? Go for it! This year has taught me life is short and nothing is certain, there is no point in doing things that don't bring you joy.
I became stronger in my beliefs and know where I stand: Everything this year has been undeniably polarizing, making it impossible to not form a strong opinion about the world we live in and be able to state and defend that opinion.
I was forced to spend time with myself: I have always preferred to spend time alone, but this year I have had to spend a lot of time inside of my own head, not only getting to know myself, but trying to figure out what exactly I want out of life and how I could make it happen.
So in short, this year was utter crap, but I am a firm believer of finding the light in any and all bad situations. I hope this holiday season we can all find things to be grateful for, no matter how small.
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